Building confidence for kids is so important. Once a child has lost his confidence and self-esteem, rebuilding it can be a tricky task. You want to allow it to come naturally and foster the growth of their new self-image, not force it upon them. You’ve to tow the line, moving only when needed, and never pushing or prodding too hard. If you do, the results could be catastrophic as he feels like he has to have you nearby to function.

One strategy you can use is positive reinforcement. This is a very simple strategy: when something good happens in their life, as a result of his actions, make sure they know that they caused it. Reward them: pizza, ice cream, or let him stay up late one night but even better is to try to use intrinsic rewards such as helping your child to note their feelings of success. The connection you’re trying to foster is that good thing can happen because he wants them to: you aren’t making them happen as a parent, he is.

Strategy to use

Another strategy you may use to build confidence for kids is conversing with your child and making sure they know that bad things don’t always happen because they deserve it. You can reinforce this with affirmations: you want your child to know that, although they may be going through difficult times, they aren’t worthless or any less of a person because they’re going through difficulties.


You should never laugh at their ideas, no matter how crazy seem to be. Like adults, kids want to be taken seriously. When they get the sense they’re being mocked, their instinct is to get angry, shut down, and not share more ideas for fear of more of the same treatment. After all, kids naturally see the world through a different lens than we do. You might be surprised what you hear once you show your child that you’re listening and that you take their ideas seriously.

You can also try putting them in unfamiliar social conditions. The only way to establish a level of comfort is to first experience discomfort. Also, you can boost their confidence by having them learn to play a musical instrument. Playing an instrument yields too many positive results for it to be ignored. Once they’ve reached an age where they’re dextrally and mentally capable, learning to play an instrument not only relieves stress but it can also boost self-esteem in a major way.

Let them help you in the kitchen. Yes, most kids are far more interested in the eating rather than the preparing of foods, but you’ll be surprised by how much one experience can turn things around. Moreover, you should make it a point to celebrate their achievements and success. I’m not talking about giving them a gold star every time they eat a carrot. It is even more important to show children that extra effort will yield benefits in order to instill the idea within them that they’re capable of greatness and that hard work pays dividends.

You can actually learn something from your child by having him or her teach you something. Let your kid teach you something. This will help build his or her confidence. A beginner’s card trick, a scale on the piano, or anything that positions them as the subject matter expert will work. Encourage them to share their knowledge (without bragging) with you and others. Odds are they’ll be brimming with confidence with their head held high.

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Be a role model to your kids. Show confidence in your actions. This one seems intuitive, but often gets overlooked. Whether you know it or not, you are your child’s most pronounced role model. So, how can you expect your kids to have confidence when you are the ones they look up to and you don’t even have it?

Make your kids talk about their problems. If you have a 7-year-old who recently started throwing a fit every time you make eye contact with her, odds are it’s for a reason. The easy, instinctive thing to do is to punish her and be done with it. The more forward-thinking approach also includes sitting down afterward to talk and figuring out the exact reason for the anger.

Give your kids the opportunity to grow by allowing them to fail. While success is pretty easy to deal with, learning to cope with failure is no easy task, especially when you’re not used to it. In order to get used to it, you simply have to experience it, time and time again.Let your kids experience failure when they’re attempting to build Legos or attempting to ride a bike without training wheels. It may anger them at first but it will help them later on in life by giving them the confidence they need.

The most effective method for rebuilding confidence though, is to foster creativity: when your child looks at something they’ve created, they feel an intense surge of pride. Nothing can build a new self image as quickly as a creative burst by your child: this is true no matter the form of expression, be it art, drawing, or writing. You want to be there for your child, showing them what they create reflected in your emotions. Don’t demean them, though: if they want to improve, help them improve. Show them the way to get better at their new hobby.

No matter the method you choose, you must remember that your child comes first. What they want, their hopes and dreams, are what you must reinforce: show them that their thought, their opinion matters. There’s no way to build self-confidence without doing that; unless they create it for themselves, you can’t force them to have self-worth or self-esteem. You must be there to foster their growth, but not to shove and prod them into situations they don’t choose. With that in mind, you can do your best to help improve your child’s confidence.

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